Gah! Tiny Men!

Whelp, my head went all splodey yesterday. Not unexpected with the way I was feeling, but disappointing all the same. Heavy drugs are a good thing. In fact I was feeling so good last night I should have blogged. Would have made for some funny reading today, if somewhat incoherent. I'm told my eyes were rather glazed like a doughnut. And my limbs were rather floppy. But I wasn't crying or throwing up, so I'll take a severe lack of co-ordination (which is rather close to my natural unmedicated state anyways) and a resemblance to tasty baked goods any day over the alternative.

This morning I feel much better, but we're taking it easy just to play on the safe side. Makes for boring blogging doesn't it?

Thank goodness I found this in my bathroom this morning. Just to spice things up.

How on earth that got in my bathroom I had no idea. Thank goodness I happen to live with a professional lizard catcher.

He caught him in under 10 seconds. It was amazing. I was so grateful. Because goodness knows I'm not about to touch that lizard. If Meaty hadn't been able to catch the lizard my only alternative would have been to stare at the lizard all day, so I knew where it was at all times, until The Greatest could come home and dispatch the lizard for me. Because I am not about to touch a lizard. I've gotten over the cricket thing, and I can squish them with a random flip flop with the best of them. I've mostly gotten over the spider thing and I can squish them with minimal crying. But I've got to draw the line somewhere, and it is lizards. I can't touch them. I simply can't. Everybody has a limit and for the moment that is mine.

I was grateful to Meaty for catching the lizard. Until the Greatest called on his lunch break and I relayed the harrowing story of how a lizard was three inches from my leg. The Greatest has a theory on how the lizard got all the way upstairs and into our Master Bathroom. He thinks Meaty snuck the lizard into his bedroom in the first place. He said Meaty was acting very odd a few days ago and appeared to be hiding something. The Great Detective can't prove anything, but he thinks the lizard in our bathroom is the same lizard Meaty has been keeping in a box on our back patio. And Meaty caught him so quickly because it is his pet lizard that he has been hand-feeding crickets for the past month and petting every day.

BOYS!

So glad I've only got to live through one of them. I don't think my heart could take more than one small boy sneaking and losing pet lizards in the house.