My sad sad mistake

I have this beautiful blue Koigu KPPP357Q-whatever. It's sock yarn. Very pricey sock yarn. Dreamy, soft, pricey sock yarn. I can't remember what The Greatest did wrong to allow me to order such pricey sock yarn, but it must have been something bad. This yarn is simply gorgeous. It is a beautiful blue color way with purple and grey undertones. I just love it. I stroke it, and we look at patterns together, my Koigu and I. I dream of wearing it. But nothing seem good enough for this yarn. Like an overprotective Mother with her dating son, nothing looked special enough for it. This yarn was in danger of becoming "too nice to knit with." And nobody wants that.

It is a cruel ironic twist of fate that curses some yarn to be so nice the knitter can not bear to knit with it and risk ruining all the thing that make that yarn what it is. Yarn wants to be knit. It doesn't want to stay in it's hank form. A hank is yarn's lowest form of being. It yearns to be touched and knit and purled. It wants to be something bigger than what is it, with form and shape and function. I longed to give my Koigu function.

So when I went on vacation I brought my two greatest loves, The Greatest and my Koigu. I decided on the River Rapid pattern for my long awaited socks. I loved knitting that pattern with it's clever slanted decreases, and the blue of my Koigu was the perfect cool stream blue. It was nice knitting for the plane and while The Greatest was doing his interviewing stuff. This knitting just seemed to flow together.



Aren't they beautiful?



Just look at them.



The mock cables really do seem to flow down the leg like a stream. Just as I envisioned they would.

But what's this you see? Are these socks still on the needles? They're all done, why on earth would they still be on the needles? Why haven't I sewn them up and done the dance of the happy knitter? This yarn has almost reached it's full potential, why have I denied bringing it's dream to fruition by letting them languish on the needles unworn?

I've got a good reason.

It's because I hate them.

I know, how could I hate them when they look so beautiful. I really have found the perfect pairing of yarn and pattern, beauty and function. What complaint could I possibly have against something that look so good?

In short: they feel like iron. I knit them on two size 0 circular needles. Until this week I have always knit socks on size 0. And my socks have always been soft and infinitely wearable. My Sockettes were the first socks I have knit on larger needles. Oh how I wish it had occurred to me to knit my Koigu on larger needles. The yarn felt thicker than my other sock yarn, but I didn't think that would be a problem. It was a little tedious to use on such small needles, k2tog was a little harder than usual, but hey, it's always turned out well in the past so I soldiered on. I persevered in the pursuit of perfection (say that five times fast) And now I have unwearable socks. They are so tightly knit they could stand up on their own. Sure, they would probably wear forever, but they feel so icky who would want to wear them.



So my sad little unlovable socks are now



two beautiful, slightly lumpy hanks of unfulfilled potential.

How could I not have seen I was making the most obvious of knitting mistakes. These socks were doomed before I knit the first stitch. Such a perfect pairing of pattern and yarn. Such an obscene choice of needles. Is it possible Boyd is behind this?