Tuesday, June 20, 2006

An open letter to the purveyors of evil

Dear Evil Geniuses (Genusi?),

I'm not precisely sure what we, the humble knit bloggers, have done to gain your attention. I can not imagine what sin we have committed against you to incur your wrath. I don't know what we have done to make you turn your evil powers against us. But I would like to apologize.

The humble knit bloggers just wants to share their knitting. We spend hours crafting masterpieces from two pointy sticks and a bit of string. Sometimes the results are sublime, sometimes ridiculous, but always worth sharing. We have no underlying plot against anyone. We have no hidden agenda. We are not a terrorist sleeper cell. Purl, Yarn-Over, SSK and KTBL are knitting terms, not code words. We have done nothing to you.

Yet you have inexplicably chosen to turn your attention to us. You have decided to harm us, to bring our communication and sharing to a complete stand still. And you have formed the most effective plot. You have found a way to bring all communication and sharing to a stop. Like flipping off a switch, you have halted knit blogging. You have brilliantly chosen to attack our digital cameras. Without pictures we can not share knitting. We can write that we have finished a raglan sweater, but without pictures we can not share the brilliant stitch pattern, the perfectly matched sleeve increases, the smooth, even knitting. We can write about a finished lace shawl, but without the accompanying picture the reader will never truly appreciate the cobweb-like delicacy, the intricacy of the knit stitches and yarn overs. Without pictures we can not ohh and ahh over the perfect shade of yarn, or at least a close approximation therein.

So Evil Doers. I admit your plot is pure genius. You have hit Batty, Pyewacket, and Myself. Only you know how many others you have stricken with dead cameras, or in my case suddenly defective cameras. But I must ask you to immediately cease and desist.

As I have said the humble knit blogger is a peaceful creature, intent on merely sharing her handiwork with other knitters who can truly appreciate the time and effort that went into the creation therein. But if you continue to attack against us we will turn our attention to you.

Do you not understand that we carry pointy sticks with us wherever we go? Do you not understand that we have an extensive communication structure already in place, not only through knitblogs, but through on-line communities like Knitty, and Craftster as well? And when I said KTBL was not a code word, I might have been fibbing. I've written it twice in this post already. Our counter-strike might already be in motion.

You should be afraid. Although afraid might be too mild a word, it doesn't really connotate what our intention are. You should be trembling-terrified-sleeping-with-one-eye-open-wetting-yourself-when-you-hear-a-loud-noise-behind-you afraid.

So in the future you might want to leave peaceful us, and our digital cameras alone.

Thank You,

The humble knit bloggers

4 comments:

Lynda said...

You tell 'em!!! Well said.

Pyewacket said...

Oh no, you too?!

It sucks to shell out the money, but on the bright side, I really like my new camera. LOL

KTBL received and understood. K1 Sl1 PSSO is now in motion...

Anonymous said...

Oh Man!! That stinks...but I think they got the message!

hiding my camera in case they come looking for me! ;)

turtlegirl76 said...

I can only hope I'm not next.

Remember, DO got hit too.