Friday, September 23, 2016

Oh The Possiblities


I'd forgotten precisely how quickly a teeny tiny toddler sweater knits up. 

I'm roughly twenty four hours in and I'm already ready to divide the sweater at the base of the arm hole for the front and back.

I was holding the sweater up to the Queen to check the fit when Pork Chop exclaimed how cute the sweater was and that she needed one as well.

The wheels in my mind are turning.

Every year my children get a sweater at Christmas that I lovingly refer to as their Weasley Sweater.  Could this be the year that the children receive actual Weasley Sweaters for Christmas?

Thursday, September 22, 2016

It's Fall Y'All

Guess What????!!!!!


Of course I've had my home decorated for Fall for weeks now.


Because I'm me, and it's what I do. (side note:  My favorite part of this picture is the football watching Husband on the couch in the back.  Makes me smile)

After I finished knitting my stripey pants I realized my hat box of sock yarn was dangerously low and lacking in variety.  It was most blue and brown.  And there were only a dozen or so colorways left.

So I thought to my self "Self, how can we get more left over sock yarn."

After much pondering of my dillema I came to one conclusion.

Short of begging, buying, borrowing, or stealing from other knitters, the only surefire way to acquire more left over sock yarn is to knit more socks!

And that my friends is where my love of fall and my love of knitting socks intersect


Just look at that fantastic fall colorway.


so full of burn red and forest green and oatmeal stripes.

The color way is called Jingle, which suggests more of a Christmas feeling to me.  It does have the red and green.  But in my mind Christmas colors feel brighter.  This feels more like the beautiful fade of fall.

I didn't use a pattern.  I just sat and knit a sock.

I know!

No pattern!

I knit the sock right from my brain!

Sometimes I impress myself!

I did try a new technique designed to eliminate that tiny hole you (or maybe I, maybe it's just me) get when you (I) pick up stitches for the gusset.


Yeah, it didn't work.

I also tried a new ssk technique, that involved slipping stitches strategically and the turning the work to purl and I'm calling that one a great big FAIL as well.  So not only did it NOT give me prettier ssk decreases, but it also created a "ladder" between the knit stitch and the ssk stitch.

So the hunt for the beautiful ssk continues.


Ladders and holes aside, I love my fall socks.

It turns out The Queen is quite the camera hog.  I wasn't sure she knew what an actual camera was.  I was pretty sure she thought only my phone took photos.  But when she saw me taking pictures of my socks she insisted on getting in on the action.


When I turned the camera to her and asked her to smile this is the face I got.


I love that face!

In honor of the First Day of Fall I cast on a project using a very faded fall feeling olivey green


Hello Pumpkin Stitch Marker!

As The Queen has outgrown almost all of her sweaters I need to get a jump on making her new ones before the cold(ish) weather descends.

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

More Madness

So when I said I was obsessed with knitting leggings I wasn't being overly dramatic, or exaggerating my feelings.  It wasn't hyperbole.

In July I was legitimately OBSESSED with knitting leggings.  They were the ONLY thing I wanted to knit.  And ALL I wanted to do was knit them.

You are all familiar with Exhibit A



It was well documented here.

Allow me to introduce you to Exhibit B.


Pardon the weird angle of my feet.  I saw an article titled "How to look good in every picture" and they suggested making triangles with your body.  I'm young and impressionable.  I decided it couldn't hurt to try.  So I made a triangle with my feet.  I'm pretty sure it looks as awkward as it felt, but scientifically my feet are now 42% more attractive because they form a triangle so I guess that's something.

I wish I weren't such a slacker and had been blogging in real time.  I knit them back in July.  I cast on for them about five minutes after I cast off the other pants.  You wouldn't believe how quickly I knit these pants.

I think it was five days from start to finish.

I am not kidding when I say I was OBSESSED.

Then I kept waiting for a good hair to take a pictures of my pants.  Because you can't photograph pants without good hair...right...I mean...right...I guess that's a thing... isn't?  Well, it's obviously a thing for me.  So I kept waiting.  And waiting.  And waiting.  And I did have an amazing hair day on September 10th, but I was away and couldn't take pictures of leggings.  We'll (hopefully) return to the subject of September 10th and my fantastic hair at a future time and blogpost.  Until then allow me to present photographic evidence of my epically good hair day


Yes that is a fuzzy pink tiara.  I'm telling you, there's a blog post there, we'll get back to it.

Anyways...about my pants...


I gave up on waiting for a good hair day, and in the interest of keeping it real, this isn't even a clean hair day.  It is an it's out of my way and I really need to take pictures of my pants so I guess we can make this work hair day.  Somedays that's the best you can hope for.  Also triangle with my bottom leg.  I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be an isosceles or equilateral triangle not a scalene but I get beauty points for trying right?  Like 18% better?

Bird and I decided we would set up a cool artsy photoshoot of my pants to keep things interesting.


It didn't really go as planned.  Dear Lord is my arse really that wide?


Turns out we are neither cool nor artsy.  Although I did form an isosceles triangle with my wide butt leading up to my knees.  SCORE  My butt looks 42% prettier.


We don't care that we are neither cool nor artsy.  Nor do we really care how wide my butt looks in what turned out to be a VERY unflattering angle.


We only care about my cool stripey legging goodness.

Relevant Details:  These were knit on size 2 needles using various bits of left over sock yarn.  I knit two rows of black and then six rows of a random sock yarn.  I knit the same stripe sequence on each leg.  Eventually I ran out of black sock yarn and for a while I used some lace weight black yarn held trippled for the black stripe, but eventually I ran out of that and I had to break down and buy a single skein of black yarn to finish my pants.  (which is why it took five days not three to finish my pants).  Also notice I did not make a triangle with my feet, and while they look more comfortable they are 43% uglier.  #science


So these pants are warm and comfy and I wish I didn't live on the surface of the bloody sun so I could wear them.  Also Triangle!

And now here's what you're really here for.  Not for my awkward pictures or witty sarcasm or even my most expert knitting.  You're here for the toddler.  I know.  It's ok.  I feel the same way about her.





Oh yeah, we got a cat.

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Epic!

Oh my poor blog.

I knew it had been a long time, but I had no idea exactly how long it had been until it took me three times to log in because I couldn't remember my password.

Also my last post was in May.

THE BEGINNING OF MAY!  AND THIS IS THE END OF JULY FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD!

Bad blogger.  No home made ice cream for me.

I'm just kidding.  I'm totally going to eat homemade ice cream tonight!

But back to blogging.

After such an epic break from blogging I must come back with an epic knit to redeem myself.


And redeem myself I shall.

You know how you take all your left over sock yarn, and you throw it in a hat box, and you swear that someday you will make something from all your leftovers even though you have no idea what?



Well someday has arrived!

Allow me to introduce the Epic Pants of Epicness


I just decided I needed epic knit pants.  It was an idea that took hold in my brain and I could not stop until I had knit them.  I didn't want to eat or sleep or interact with my children.  I just wanted to watch Gossip Girl and knit my pants.  I sat down with my ipad and ravelry and randomly choose yarn combinations and charts as I knit.  I tried to include a bunch of my favorite things



Like sheep.  And Penguins.  And Rubber Ducks.


And the Tardis.


I can't decide what I love here more...the storm trooper?  or the bunny heads peeking out above the ribbing?  A complete list of patterns I used can be found of my Ravelry project page here

I was so obsessed with the idea of knitting these pants that I broke my longstanding "NO Elizabeth Zimmerman Under Any Circumstances EVER" rule.  I started with an Elizabeth Zimmerman pattern ("Nether Garments" from Knitters Almanac for those who care to know) but it was more of a general guideline than a really helpful pattern.  Constantly trying them on to see if I'd made enough increases turned out to be the most helpful thing to do.

I hid my increases up the back of my leg


Eh.  It isn't the prettiest, but it's also where I can't see it.  So it doesn't bother me.

And I have to admit, I just couldn't help myself


I knit the "fornicating reindeer" chart across my butt.

I HAD to.

My inner twelve year old demanded it.

I knit eyelets in the middle of the ribbing so I could add a cute tie at the waist to help hold them up.



These pants are crazy warm.  I may not turn on my heat at all this winter so it can get cold enough in my house to justify wearing them.



I don't care.  I'm not even mad at them for being so warm.  I just love them.

These pants are epically awesome and they might just be my mostest favoritest thing I have ever made in the history of ever.

Also The Greatest told me "They're not as ugly as I thought they were going to be."  

So there's that too.

Monday, May 02, 2016

Still Breathing

Holy cow.  It has been almost a month!

Where does the time go?

If you are thinking that I finished that lacey scarf weeks ago and shoved it unblocked into The Abyss where it is currently languishing, well, you would be wrong.


I have chosen to let it languish, unblocked, in a basket on top of my yarn cabinet.

Alone.

Without the comfort of other unloved unblocked handknits to keep it company.

I might be a terrible person.

Let me distract you with cute pictures of the Queen.





With this much toddler cuteness is it any wonder I can't seem to get anything done?

Thursday, April 07, 2016

A Return to the Old Ways

So I have a purple mess of yarn ends and untried potential to conquer


And a stack of hats just waiting to be blocked.


I was unusually efficient when I knit these hats.  I even wove the ends in as soon as I finished knitting each one.  It really is a quick soak and done situation.

But despite my previous efforts to be a monogamous knitter, to work on one project from start to finish without interruption, I have returned to my slutty yarn ways and decided to ignore my obligations and instead turn to the open arms of a new love


A little cake of unknown origin.

No ball band.  No idea how it came to be mine.  No information on fiber content, yardage, even yarn weight.

It isn't lace weight, but it isn't quite thick enough to be fingering.

Weighing in at 83 grams I'm not even certain it is an entire skein of yarn.  It might be someone's leftovers.

Who knows.

I just know I love its creamy/brown/blue goodness.

I must create something.

I'm feeling unusually scarfy.

Light, lacey scarfy.

Do you ever feel like you spend more time looking at patterns on Ravelry than you spend knitting?

That was me the other night searching for the perfect pattern for my mystery yarn.

Pattern after pattern after pattern.

Until I finally settled on a feathers and fan scarf.

I love feathers and fan.


Until the yarn pools in a weird vertical striping pattern.

And then I hate feathers and fan.

Back to Ravelry I go.

Only this time, in the interest of salvaging my ever dwindling knitting time, I picked the first "yeah, this could work" pattern I saw.


Yeah.  

This could work.

I'm a third of the way through this yarn and the scarf is going to be very short.  Unless I can stretch it long when I block.  When I stretch it it is a perfect size.  The mystery fiber content feels cotton/nylon/acrylicy.  None of which are super awesome at holding a block.  I'm feeling pretty confident that this will stretch and be long and block perfect.  And the second I remove it from the blocking wires it will shrink back up into its previously stubby proportions.

But since I like to flirt with disaster I just keep knitting.

Plus if it shrinks up too short I can always give it to one of the kids.

But realistically I will probably knit this and then shove it into The Abyss to be forgotten and unblocked for a year or two.  Don't worry.  It will have all those shawls I knit last summer to keep it company.

Monday, April 04, 2016

The Best Laid Plans

I had such plans to blog on Friday.

I knit, and I took pictures, and I had things written in my head.

And then Queen Bean just casually walked up and poured a cup of water on my laptop.

I'm not sure I have ever moved so fast in my life.

The laptop was tipped to pour the water off, and towel dried, and turned off, and flipped upside down.

And then we left it alone all weekend.

I crossed my fingers, and wished, and hoped, and prayed, and wondered how much rice I would need to submerge my laptop in a garbage bag of rice.

I held my breath when I booted up my computer, still fearful that things would go wrong and somehow water on my computer would cause the entire laptop to mysteriously catch fire.

Mercifully no pyrotechnics ensued.

Just the Microsoft logo.

Everything seems to be running just fine, and in the end I'm not sure water ever even got past the outer case.  The mysterious inner working of my device may never have even been in any danger.

But we took precautions just in case.

And I was once again reminded that I really need to back up my pictures (which I should be doing now but I am blogging for you instead.  That's called priorities.)

So back to friday morning.

I finished knitting my two sleeves.  The final elements of my purple sweater.

And I then carefully removed all the safety pins I could find.


And just to be on the safe side I had The Greatest go over the sweater looking for the knitwear destroying pins as well.

When none were found, at 10 am, I once again submerged my sweater in anticipation of blocking.


I sat down to watch the new episode of Grey's Anatomy with the grand plans to lay the sweater out when the episode was over.  And entire 47 minutes later.

But when the episode was over The Queen needed something, and then I had to run to the store, and then I needed to make lunch, and then the kids came home from school, and then I had to make dinner.  And it goes on and on and on.

I finally got down to the business of blocking at 7:00 that night.

Nine hours later.

Mold and rust free.


The sweater is blocked and dried and waiting for the moment of truth.

I need to try it on and see once and for all what I have created.

Did I finally achieve the perfect Grown Up Girl sweater I have dreamed of?  Or is it too small?  Or are the sleeves too long?  Or are there crazy textures stripes between the different kinds of yarn?

I'm feeling a lot of pressure for this sweater to be a win.

Pressure from where?  Who knows!

But the pressure is there, and I am not ready to fail yet.

So I'm going to let the sweater sit for a little longer before I take the chance.

In the meantime I knit four hats over the weekend.

But that is a tale for a different day.